When was the last time you called a friend just to chat? Cold calling is integral to my life as a founder, yet I struggle to reach out to friends. I fear disrupting them, believing everyone is busy. In reality, they’ll only answer if they have time.
We live in a time where everyone we know is just a couple of taps away, yet calls rarely happen unless there’s a need. My mission at Life Jugglers is to normalize mundane conversations. Do you also have a craving for some mundaneness?
A few weeks ago, I called my brother during his lunch break at a Canadian diner. Our chat paused as the waitress took his order. I listened to the exchange, relieved not to have to remember the details. It felt peaceful just to hear without needing to listen.
It’s exhausting to constantly pay attention. The more we focus, the harder it becomes to maintain that focus. As a result, people become more desperate to be heard, but with our attention stretched thin, few are willing or able to truly listen.
As a travelling winemaker, connecting was easy over shared passion and wine. It became hard when I settled somewhere. Suddenly, I needed to fit into new surroundings where people were already content with their lives.
I dabbled with different communities until I finally found one where I felt I belonged. I loved it, attended every meeting, and even hosted events to get involved. When my daughter was on the verge of being born, I left to start anew. I refused to be a weekend Dad.
I was happy at home, but missed friends and meaningful conversations. There was a lot going on, and we didn’t have time for it. As a coach, I spiralled downwards. Everyone wanted me to listen, but I also needed to be heard.
I felt completely alone, surrounded by people who all wanted me to be there for them. I wanted to support them, I wanted to be there for them, but I started losing myself in the process. I forgot about my mission. I was desperate to be heard. I felt the world had moved on without me, that I had somehow missed something, and I struggled to understand how I could have been so wrong about everything.
It hit me: I wasn’t heard because I was always listening. When I voiced this, people started to listen. The first time my mom gave me space, I said nothing. I just needed room to express myself, the kind I’d been offering others. I needed a coach, someone to listen with my interests in mind.
With a coach, I finally feel myself again. Just an hour a week of undivided attention helps me focus on what I need to do. To turn ideas into a plan and then execute that plan, knowing that someone will ask me how it went the following week.
Listen to our first coaching session on Spotify conversation at:
